I have opted to remain anonymous to protect my identity from the embarrassment. Last night, I became hungry and opted to make some ramen. I took out the various packets from the bowl, added the seasoning and veggies, then put the bowl in the microwave. After about a minute or two, I realized something was wrong. A terrible burning smell had filled my kitchen. I opened the door to my microwave and…behold…I had neglected to include water. There was some smoke emanating from the bowl. Not wanting to waste the ramen, I went to the sink and added water, which filled the room with acrid smoke for several seconds. I then returned the bowl once more in the microwave and cooked it for two more minutes before attempting to eat it. Well…It went okay for a little while, until I found a globule of blackened noodles which had transformed into some sort of bizarre crystalline substance never before seen. I had a change of mind.