I have decided to keep my identity hidden to shield my identity from the ridicule. Last night, I felt hungry and opted to make some ramen. I removed the various packets from the bowl, put in the flavor and dried vegetables, then put the bowl in the microwave. After about a short while or two, I understood something was wrong. A awful burning smell had permeated my kitchen. I unlatched the door to my microwave and…behold…I had failed to include water. There was some smoke rising from the bowl. Not wanting to waste the ramen, I went to the sink and added water, which engulfed the room with acrid smoke for several seconds. I then placed the bowl back in the microwave and cooked it for two more minutes before attempting to eat it. Well…It went okay for a little while, until I encountered a globule of blackened noodles which had become some sort of strange crystalline substance unknown to humanity. I had a second thoughts.