I have opted to remain anonymous to safeguard my identity from the foolishness. Yesterday evening, I got hungry and chose to make some ramen. I extracted the various packets from the bowl, put in the spice mix and vegetables, then put the bowl in the microwave. After about a short while or two, I noticed something was wrong. A horrible burning smell had filled my kitchen. I unlatched the door to my microwave and…lo and behold…I had failed to put in water. There was some smoke rising from the bowl. Not wanting to throw away the ramen, I went to the sink and added water, which filled the room with acrid smoke for several seconds. I then placed the bowl again in the microwave and cooked it for two more minutes before attempting to eat it. Well…It went okay for a little while, until I encountered a mass of blackened noodles which had turned into some sort of peculiar crystalline substance never before seen. I had a change of mind.