I have chosen to remain anonymous to shield my identity from the foolishness. Last night, I got hungry and chose to make some ramen. I removed the various packets from the bowl, included the seasoning and dried vegetables, then put the bowl in the microwave. After about a sixty seconds or two, I noticed something was wrong. A awful burning smell had saturated my kitchen. I unlatched the door to my microwave and…behold…I had failed to include water. There was some smoke rising from the bowl. Not wanting to discard the ramen, I went to the sink and poured in water, which filled the air with acrid smoke for several seconds. I then returned the bowl again in the microwave and cooked it for two more minutes before attempting to eat it. Well…It went okay for a little while, until I encountered a mass of blackened noodles which had turned into some sort of bizarre crystalline substance never before seen. I had a second thoughts.